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30th Birthday. I Welcome You.

April 9, 2019

Today, I turn 30. What a number I have dreaded. I remember thinking "that is old." I use to comment on 30 year old men who would go out with 25 year old and say "ew, he is sooo old!" 

 

BUT I do not miss that girl. That girl (in her early 20s) was beautiful, flab free, golden skinned, wrinkle free. Fun was always on the to do list. She was ALSO insecure when she didn't have to be, was immature in so many areas of life, loved with very little of her heart, judgmental, was run over by friends, and extremely selfish with her money and time. 

 

Life is truly beautiful! Each year I learn more and more about life, marriage, kids, relationships, money, physical appearance, and love. What exactly is so earth-shattering that I learned from my 20's? I could write a book with example after example of things I learned, but you know, I like list :)

 

 

1. Physical appearance comes and goes. But more make up and dieting won't help.

 

Trust me, dieting more and exercising makes you age faster. More makeup equals more room for errors. Embrace the few extra pounds and find what works best for you. Don't let social media tell you to conture your face or do a keto diet so your breath stinks (sister #1, haha). If you have true joy and content in life - THAT will show through more than any back breaking exercise, skin care routine, or diet you are doing. "Laughter is the best medicine"

 

2. Run from conflict and let it GO!

 

Maybe you are right. Maybe you had several years of schooling on that subject someone is bashing (couch cough, my Dr. Husband on vaccines). Seriously, walk away, better yet, RUN AWAY! Your opinion will not change their mind in a heated debate. It's not worth ruining your character or relationship with people. The people I avoid like the plague are the ones that try to debate me....because life is to short. "Love one another."

 

 

3. Kids (for me) were and still are the keys that unlock parts of my heart and add ALOT of humbling moments.

 

I had my first child at 25, second at 27. I love harder, cry often, and laugh frequently. But man, bodily functions and tantrums will humble you over and over. I'm extremely sad when couples say they don't want kids. Not because they can't have them, but they choose not to. Kids are one of the most blessed things I have in my life and try to cherish their little lives everyday!

 

 

4. Life is stressful enough - don't make it worse with money problems.

 

Just say no to subscription boxes that give that moment of excitement once a month. No to buying that special coffee that lasts half an hour. Or that big house to show off. Learn to say "no" to dinners out or weekends you can't afford. Money is the number one cause of marriage problem. Try your best to not make money an issue.

 

5. The importance of boundaries are essential in any relationship.

 

I read Boundaries in Marriage, and it changed my whole outlook on life. Yes, it is specifically geared towards marriage, but the concept can be used in any relationship. If someone in life is hurting you, whether it be emotionally or taking advantage of you, it's because YOU allow it. Boundaries are important in your relationship with kids, family, friends, coworkers, and it WILL make you happier and healthier!

 

 

6. Who cares!

 

I use to walk around with a chip on my shoulder like how can they do that?! And the classic... " when i have kids..." BUT we just don't know everyone's circumstances. I've left my kids in the car because I was so sick and needed medicine and couldn't stomach taking the kids out.of the car seat and back in. I've yelled at my husband in public. I've hit my kid's head on things. I've went into stores with my kids dirty or me in pj's. Life happens and we all can't be perfect. So let that judgement go and move on. People do what works for them, and all you are accountable for is you and your kids. 

 

7. It's OK to ask for help.

 

I was raised never to ask for help, to do everything myself. But it simply is not true. Asking for help takes a big person, and it's truly OK.

 

 

8. Confidence is something to be proud of.

 

It's not a pride thing - it's a humbling experience to admit your faults when your decisions don't go as plan. Admit it, accept the consequences, and learn. This process happens over and over again, and then you become confident enough to make any decision! 

 

9. Not everyone will like you. 

 

Don't hold grudges, respect others, and have empathy for one another. But you won't "click" with everyone, and that's OK!

 

 

10. Finding contentment is a beautiful thing.

 

Social media kills people emotionally. Stop comparing yourself to others. Yes, you might have a smaller house or live with your parents, but being content with who you are and what you have is priceless. Surround yourself with loving relationships and love them even harder back. 

 

Hello 30's. I am excited to see what the next decade will teach me, memories it will hold, and the journeys that will come. I greatly welcome you. "Life is a beautiful ride!"

 

Love this 30 year old gal,

Middle Sister

 

 

 

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